I was at...

"work" earlier, fucking miserable and cracked the fuck out on my diet pill bored as shit. I heard this Jabba the Hutt-ish sound (like gargling butter), looked up and gazed upon this adorable monster. Her orthopedic boots squished across the wood floor as she dragged herself to the couch.

When "she" finally sat down it sounded like a combination of a wet queef and someone stomping on a mound of slugs. Sort of like the sound it makes when you fist a wet loaf of bread. Yes, I've fisted a wet loaf of bread.

After for fucking ever she finally peeled out in the direction of Golden Coral. I took a can of Lysol over to the couch to kill any clit roaches she'd left behind, unfortunately the only thing remaining was a sweat streak from her ass in the leather.